Pearls of Wisdom: Valentine’s Day- “Hold the Chocolates” and more…

Now and then, I hope to share a few links which add insight into the topic of egalitarian marriage.  These will be posted under “Pearls of Wisdom”.

As a woman who used to think that God preferred men, I was very uplifted by the writings of numerous gentlemen providing biblical encouragement for God’s daughters and defending femininity as vital to the church and to God’s image. “God Is Not Ashamed” – Our Brothers Speak Out.  Though not exclusive to marriage nor married women, this link is included as a healing balm based on my personal experience that the healing and health of my marriage was elusive as long as I was ashamed of my feminine “weaknesses” and felt worthless and inferior to my husband.

Egalitarian men have their struggles too.  If a couple is “egalitarian” it does not mean that they are exactly the same.    What does “fatherhood” look like?  It is NOT the same as “motherhood”!  Morgan Guyton Fatherhood, Faith, and Gender Stereotypes is transparent with his questions “So for Christians who embrace gender equality, is there a place for male parenthood or is gender itself inherently problematic?

Jonalyn Fincher provides an interesting real life testimony of how she and her husband- a young egalitarian couple- share equal parenting responsibility in Hold the Chocolates while I Say Adios to Mr. and Mrs. Nag

If nagging is such a problem and so wide-spread, what can we do? The WSJ suggests that nagging makes men feel like little boys (girls, you’re not being sexy!), that nagging can ruin marriages (scared, yet?).  Bernstein says we must begin by admitting it (confess your sins? a good start), doing personality tests, learning better communication….

If you struggle with nagging, one of the sweetest little gifts for a Valentine’s Day present is to back up five paces on the nagging issue.


This entry was posted in Authors, Charis Hart, Pearls of Wisdom: Links and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Pearls of Wisdom: Valentine’s Day- “Hold the Chocolates” and more…

  1. Tim says:

    Great article, Charis. I really like that you included this part: “If a couple is ‘egalitarian’ it does not mean that they are exactly the same.” So many people mistake equal for identical. I’m not even identical with other men; why should I be identical to my wife? (Besides, that would require major improvements on my part!)


    P.S. Re RHE’s collection of articles men wrote in response to Dr. Piper’s comments: Keri Wyatt Kent asked me to do one that she put up on her website ( and then submitted to RHE.

  2. Charis says:

    Thank you for the comment, Tim. I read your article at the link and hear your maturity, humility, and tender-heartedness.

    May your tribe increase!

    Love, Charis

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